Blethers and blahs

Random ramblings from a chaotic life

A positive day …..

on October 11, 2006

…. today, well yesterday now, lol.

I had the doctors first thing and was very apprehensive.  Anyone with any form of mental health issues knows how difficult it is to judge other people's reactions to how you're feeling, including doctors.  I wasn't overly impressed with the reaction I got but he seemed happier when I set myself a target for going back to work, which is Monday 23rd October.  The best thing is that is a staff training day so I can go in early and stay late to plan the rest of the week and what I will be teaching.

The positive is that I went on my own and was able to spend some time in the park that is adjacent to the hospital complex, within which is my health centre.  It was a lovely day which helped and I just wandered and took pics of things that caught my eye and, for the first time in ages, I felt at peace and relaxed.

The view out across the Livingston shopping centre is fantastic.  It also reminds me of how big Livingston has become.  The shops now stretch from one side of this pic to the other, many times what it was when I first moved here, oh so long ago.  It just helps to reinforce the fact that I want to leave Livingston for somewhere smaller and a bit more isolated at some point before I retire.  At the moment it's not possible, what with Gordon's parents and my kids, but hopefully one day. 

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I love the autumn, even when it's cold and frosty, I love to see the leaves change colour and the berries appear, it is my favourite time of the year and I think that helped my positive mood yesterday.

Scrapping wise I am addicted to the Lippy Chick books I bought from Angela and have now finished three of the four I bought.  There will a new style available at the retreat so I will have to buy some more then. 

I have made on each for Mark and Michelle with pics of Beth and Katy and a halloween one, just ready for the photos to be added.  I want to do one for Sean, who thinks they are a great idea, and one for my aunt Jean, who I need to go and visit soon.  The last time I visited my aunt Jean she lent some photos so the book is by way of a thank you to her.  I will take pics of the halloween one later then make an album on here for folks to see.

I was reading a friend's blog yesterday and she wrote that she finds writing her blog therapeutic as it gives her a voice and lets her say things she might not otherwise get the chance to say.  I feel exactly the same.  I am writing this for me as an online diary, if others take the time to read it then that is great but it's main purpose is as a stress reliever for me.  I look on this as my online counselling session and so far it seems to be helping, if only by encouraging me to think about the positive things in my life like Gordon, my family and my brilliant friends.  If you are reading this then thank you for taking the time to do so.

I am away back to bed, having been up since 2.45am, one of the less pleasant side effects of anxiety is very disturbed sleep, lol.  At least it gives me time to craft in peace!

Take care x

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